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The Xenophobe's Guide to the Scots

by David Ross

A guide to understanding the Scots that gets under their kilts to reveal all in an affectionate and humorous fashion.

The Xenophobe's Guide to the Scots
is now available on Kindle
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Extracts from the book

Innate instincts
A Scotsman likes to feel that, almost by instinct, he could guddle a trout (palm it out of the water) or gralloch a deer (disembowel it with his knife), even if he spends his day driving a bus or designing software.

A kilty cover-up
If the Scots were to shed their seriousness, they would be noisier than the Neapolitans and wilder than the dancing Dervishes. Their reserve is not a defence against the rest of the world: it is a protective cover, like the lid of a nuclear reactor.

Rob joy
Calvinism is still deeply ingrained in the Scottish soul. A Scottish poet, overcome by the joy of sunshine and blue sky, once cried out what a fine day it was. The woman to whom he spoke replied, 'We'll pay for it, we'll pay for it'.

Cunning and clever
The Scots respect cleverness and like to feel that they possess plenty of it themselves. In Scotland there is nothing wrong with being clever, so long as you show it by words or actions, rather than by bragging. You don't have to hide it. To say of someone that 'he has a good conceit of himself' is neither praise nor blame, just a statement of fact.

Comments from readers

If you ever wanted to know what makes them tick north of the border this book does it. And its a quick read too. Most enjoyable.
Newcastle, UK

As a Scot myself I can vouch for the uncanny accuracy of this book. A sympathetic (but not unquestioning), highly entertaining, accurate, and short book which explains what makes the Scots tick and also explains some the qualities that have helped them make a contribution to so many other countries where they have settled.
Londonderry, UK

Reviews from the Press

A new series of books which takes a light-hearted look at the residents of various countries without crossing the line between funny and cruel.
North of Scotland Newspapers

The Xenophobe's Guides raise a smile and give you an understanding of the beliefs and foibles of nationalities.
Glasgow Evening Times

Table of Contents
Nationalism and Identity
Character
Attitudes and Values
Happy Families
Manners and Behaviour
Leisure and Pleasure
Drinking and Eating
Custom and Tradition
Sense of Humour
Culture
Systems
Culture
Systems
Business and Commerce
Government
Language

 

Author: David Ross
Format: 96 pages, pb
Published: 01/12/08
Updated: December 2008
Price: £4.99
ISBN: 978-1-906042-47-9
Online eBook. Click on button below to sample.
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